There is a very frightening type of person in psychology, and that is someone who cannot communicate properly. For this type of person, we have a professional term called emotion dysregulation. They find it very difficult to communicate calmly with others in intimate relationships, often starting conversations with anger or extreme states. Even when they want to express concern, their speech is laced with hostility, sarcasm, and a sense of gunpowder, full of hostility. Moreover, the closer the relationship, the worse their attitude may become. People with emotional barriers often carry deep trauma behind their behavior, because when a person feels that expressing emotions is very dangerous, they tend to substitute more direct, rough, or aggressive ways of expressing themselves, which they perceive as safer.

Most likely, in their early years, they lived for a long time in an environment where their emotions were ignored or even not allowed to be expressed. Once they do express their true feelings, they might face rejection or punishment. For example, a child being bullied at school might cry and complain to their mother at home. If the mother not only fails to comfort them but instead says, "Why are they bullying you? They don’t bully others," the child learns that crying is useless. Next time, they probably won’t cry in front of their mother again. They learn two things: first, that expressing emotions can sometimes be very dangerous; second, that they cannot rely on others to comfort or understand their feelings.

When someone habitually suppresses their emotions over a long period, they gradually become someone who cannot express or even recognize their own feelings. When they enter other relationships and face moments that require proactive emotional expression, recognizing and expressing emotions becomes very difficult and dangerous. If the other person touches a sensitive spot inside them, they will immediately defend themselves. They must attack others first to minimize potential harm to themselves.

People with emotion dysregulation, over time, may slowly become like this because they want to communicate well, but others refuse to communicate properly with them. So, they have to switch to the same angry mode. They also need to resort to personal attacks, learn to be sarcastic, and use hostility to solve problems and protect their boundaries—such as defending against invasions by others. However, this undoubtedly causes significant mental exhaustion.