It's been over three months since I experienced this. I don't want to pay off my debts now, I don't want to find a class, I don't want to date, I don't want to do anything... It seems like going to Didi won't solve any problems. I've never hated myself this much before, I don't know what I want to do, and nothing I do feels meaningful... The only thing I can feel is the long passage of time.


I really dislike negative energy, but I am the biggest source of negative emotions myself, so... what is the meaning of living, is there anything worth redemption🥹
Living is so exhausting... but I don't dare to die.
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